There is no denying the fact that your kids are one of your most precious possessions. And thanks to you they are getting best of everything possible. This in general inculcate in them a habit of holding their parents to ransom so that they could have their ways. And the fun part is – most of the times parents don’t find any problem in meeting all their stupid, irrational, and unreasonable demands.
This intractable habit ends up making these kids feel a sense of invincibility about themselves. As a consequence, the misplaced faith in their own infallibility makes them incapable of seeing issues through right perspective.
We are raising kids who are unable to differentiate between major and minor issues. In our over enthusiasm to provide an extremely protective environment we are forgetting to teach our kids that problems and challenges are indeed an integral part of ebbs and flows of any normal Life. And if someone goes through their quota of rough phases in their life it shouldn’t feel like the end of this universe.
If your kid is unable to take obstacles in right spirit and develops a tendency to entertain depressing thoughts; you need to be extra alert in intercepting early signs of depression.
Since childhood depression isn’t on many parents’ radar, all its tell tell signs can easily be missed. Transition from occasional sadness into a full-fledged clinical depression takes time and often gets manifested in form of pervasive feeling of everlasting gloom, apprehension, lack of interest, and consistent irritation.
Kids in general and teenagers in particular find themselves a safe heaven in online activities. Kids don’t realise that they are not safe but more vulnerable. Because the virtual world gives them unrestricted access and opportunity to act in the way as they wish; which in turn gives them the much-needed boost of adrenaline rush in their otherwise mundane life (where every stakeholders in their life is interested only in their academic performance).
Few of the early signs of abnormalities:
– Extreme behaviour: it’s an early indication that the child is no longer able to manage the overwhelming emotions that he is feeling inside. It often gets expressed either through innocuous tears or unexpected explosive behaviour.
– General disengagement: Usually from family members, favourite activities and friends.
We all are pretty aware that it’s all in the mind. When accumulated thoughts start playing vicious and awful tricks; kids often find it difficult to outmanoeuvre those emotionally charged thoughts on their own. That’s why they need your help, ’cause you are one of the limited few who can listen to them without being judgemental.
Here your personal initiative in helping your kids develop a balanced perspective is crucial:
– Don’t try to be a hero by solving every little problem in their life.
– Don’t push them in pursuit of some obscure and unrealistic goals.
– Teach them to appreciate the difference in opinion by being an example.
– spend some quality time with them to understand their deep-rooted apprehensions and insecurities; without being judgemental.
– Get across this difficult message that the world doesn’t owe them anything and their sense of entitlement if any is highly misplaced.
– Try to be an active participant in their small victories. Teach them the worth of every celebration.
In our endeavour to make our kids academically competitive, we end up glorifying individual success at the cost of collective victories. The significance of collaboration and cumulative intelligence never gets its respective dues, not even in our common discourse.
We need to understand and appreciate that once we desire roses in our garden, we cannot wish away all those thorns that naturally comes along with it. In fact they are an integral part of a rose plant. Therefore, our ability to accept things-as they are and not the way we wish they should be-goes a long way in shaping our wisdom.
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